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Regrets Only

by Quiet Takes

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1.
Invitation 04:29
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I’m waiting for an invitation Like some pale, wan one Standing on the front step All the curtains drawn I’m waiting for an invitation Like some devil’s dog Sitting on the back stoop All the lights gone off I’m waiting for an invitation Like some graveyard guard Sleeping in the rose bed All the windows barred I’m waiting for an invitation Like some deadbeat dawn Footprints in the driveway I’ll be moving on I’ll be moving on
2.
Oxbow Shower 03:22
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It’s all embarrassment now Walk the gauntlet and smile It’s all embarrassment now Feed flush to fire (fire) I fucked up I left it Thought that somebody else would collect it I fucked up I was waiting For a gold foil, letterpress lost invitation It’s a bad blush baby Cooling in the shower From the warmed-over regret banking every hour Cure the crush now, honey Put the heat back into the fire, Fire, the fire, fire, the fire It’s all embarrassment now Hold your hot cheeks high It’s all embarrassment now Feed flush to fire (fire) I fucked up I missed it I was pining for divine signs of permission I fucked up Bowing legend Relegating self-sung duty to second It’s a bad blush baby Cooling in the shower From the warmed-over regret banking every hour Cure the crush now, honey Put the heat back into the fire, Fire, the fire, fire, the fire, fire The fire I fucked up I fucked up I fucked up
3.
Purebred 05:01
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I’m not the one wanting the vial Delivered to the door Labeled and neat, no heat One hundred percent Pure All tics checked Simple direct No mystery left Smoke without scent I’m not the one taking comfort In the page turn Delusion of the vast cast Backup confirmed New twist hiss Cannot miss Built tolerance Order up this ‘Cause I don’t have the breath left to low, to low And I don’t have the patience to show, to show you What love, what love, what love What love is What love is I’m the one running From the syringe and the squeeze shoot No pasture, no balm Just this teased Truth Stuck in the shit Shoveling Huffing out mist Pushing against ‘Cause I don’t have the breath left to low, to low And I don’t have the patience to show, to show you What love, what love, what love What love is What love is Unart—Unartificial Unart—Unartificial ‘Cause I don’t have the breath left to low (low it) And I don’t have the patience to show (show you) ‘Cause I don’t have the breath left to low (low it) And I don’t have the patience to show (show you) I’m standing, I’m standing right— I’m standing, I’m standing right— I’m standing, I’m standing right here What love, what love, what love What love is What love is
4.
Bruise 04:13
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I woke up with a bruise on my breast Yellow smudge, purple blush at the edge I tried to wash it off I think it’s from not being touched enough I stayed up: Only Lovers Left Alive I want to sleep with someone’s arm ‘cross my thigh I tried to walk it off This feeling of not being warm enough If it’s not what you have, then it’s nothing you need I’m getting real good at making believe That’s true I lit up, loose the fist in my chest Do you, too, when the doorways compress I tried to count it off One more breath before I’m fine enough I made up a daydream of you Phantom hand to pull me on through I try to laugh it off You can’t always get what you want They say to give up or they say to get out And both can’t be true, but it’s better than doubt Doubting the game I woke up I woke up I woke up I woke up
5.
No One Again 03:34
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I don’t want to write a song about you Pink elephant in the middle of the room Helium hissing from a black balloon I don’t want to write a song about you I don’t want to write a song about you Satellite streak, eclipse of the moon Broken arm slinging from an uncaught swoon I don’t want to write a song about you And when they ask me who I’ll say nobody, and it’ll be true True I don’t want to write a song about you Fingerprinted glass, hinted perfume Far-off echo from a long-gone tune I don’t want to write a song about you I don’t want to write a song about you Anvil dropping in a silent cartoon Curtain floating in a still afternoon I don’t want to write a song about you And when they ask me who I’ll say nobody, and it’ll be true True
6.
Choose 04:05
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It comes in waves It comes in contractions Call me Sisyphus Anybody interested in switching myths? Keep on triggering I’ll paint pointilistic portraits with the bullet holes Keep on burying I’ll build earthform installations with the burrows Flipping rocks Throwing stones I’ve been so very good For so very long Keep on silencing Watch me John Cage the shit out of your speaker hiss Keep on cutting in Making big paper prints with the cross sections I’m trying to believe in beauty I’m trying to believe I’m trying to believe in beauty Is it too much to ask for you to choose me? God, I was numb God, I was blind God, I was dumb God, I was polite God, I was numb God, I was blind God, I was young God, I was polite God, I was trying to get out alive I was just trying to get out alive I’m trying to believe in beauty I’m trying to believe I’m trying to believe in beauty Is it too much to ask for you to choose me?
7.
Meri Said 03:13
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Meri said: “I wanna slipstream ice Pity the proof Smile fierce & kind” Molly said: “I’m raising rackets high I wanna lose Count it as a find” (Breaking tiles in empty rooms) Trying to get down to the metamorphic core of it (Floating slack in tidal pools) Trying to get down to the metaphoric war of it (Making titles into tombs) Trying to get down to the sophomoric chore of it Trying to get down — trying to get Trying to get down — trying to get Trying to get down Billy said: “I’m born anew, drifting I’m gonna choose To lean the howlin’ wind” Katie said: “We’re not through molting Go cocoon and start again” (Breaking tiles in empty rooms) Trying to get down to the enigmatic part of it (Floating slack in tidal pools) Trying to get down to the hemorrhagic art of it (Making titles into tombs) Trying to get down to the aromatic heart of it Trying to get down — trying to get Trying to get down — trying to get Trying to get down Meri said: “I wanna slipstream ice Pity the proof Smile fierce & kind"
8.
Casual Sex 04:09
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Oh, I spent nine years getting cooly and casually fucked By a man who was supposed to love all of me But when we went to bed his soul rolled back, rolled back He didn’t touch to learn, he didn’t look to see I could have been any body I was any — Yeah, it put me off of it Forgive me: Desire should be specific Not this cold compartment But all-encompassing Well my body shut down, my body, she gave up While he ran around making himself just so lonely So I set myself free, but they tell me it’s fun To go back to the gaslight I escaped from I won’t be any body ‘Cause it put me off of it Forgive me: Desire should be specific Not this blunt instrument But wild and mythic But wild, wild, wild I’m not asking for a timeline I don’t need a treatise I’m not asking for perfection I’m not looking for Jesus I’m not waiting on a rings, hon I don’t need your promises I’m just asking: Are you serious? Are you serious? Well, are you? Yeah, it put me off of it Forgive me: Desire should be specific Not this blunt instrument But wild and mythic
9.
Cornerstone 03:55
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We used to sit shoulder to shoulder I used to put my feet up on the velvet We used to sing all of the verses I used to write what you said in my notebook There’s a joke about The Goldfinch I never finished, and Matty’s climbing in the back There’s a note about the wrong things and who gets shelter The congregation’s starting to crack When you said I was— When you said I was— We used to play Suf before sunrise I used to know which of the keys stuck We used to stand easy in circles I used to think I could convince you There's a point about privilege But you won’t take it, and Jessi says I’ll know when to leave Disappointed in the right things, the front door’s making A growl that sounds like grief When you said I was— When you said I was— And we’re throwing the cornerstones into the river We’re building up the banks And we’re feeding the shoring fires with our old bulletins We're editing the blanks When you said I was— When you said I was— When you said I was brave you meant wrong But I know right, that ain’t right When you said I was brave you meant wrong But I know right, that ain’t right I know right, and that ain’t right And we’re throwing the cornerstones into the river We’re building up the banks And we’re feeding the shoring fires with our old bulletins We're editing the blanks When you said I was— I know right, that ain’t right When you said I was— I know right, that ain’t right When you said I was— You know right, so goddamn do right When you said I was— I know right
10.
Rocky 03:52
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You’ve got your head so far up a tree My calls coil in knots, they beg you to leave I coax, when you come, I back right on down You scare me, you steal me the most gorgeous sounds Come, lay your head in my lap We’ll go through the trash you dug from the neighbor’s bin Come, take off your mask This fever will pass, we’ll tell each other stories, stories, stories Stories, stories You run the night, I work all day We pass in the dusk, I push you to stay I leave you a plate, you carve me a sign Lines on the nightstand, the last drop of wine Come, leave footprints in ash I burned all the plans I made before you came in Come, open your hand It all goes to sand, we’ll tell each other stories, stories, stories Stories, stories You, you brought me the good stuff this time You brought me the good stuff this time
11.
Central Time 05:01
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Better admitting defeat I'm not when I should be Shadow soloed in sun Back door hinging to run Follow my lead Follow my lead nowhere Hollow the tree Holler and plead: no fair I'm the vulture shrugging the sparrow off her wing I'm the egg kicked underwater at the spring I'm the coyote tracking the fence line I'm back on central time Better bitter and free It’s not what I thought it would be Borrowed bed for a week Pillow hot on my cheek Follow my lead Follow my lead looping Wallow in reeds Bother to bleed losing I'm the rose dust spit up alongside the seed I'm the runtling rumbling at the dandelion feed I’m the coyote running the fence line I'm stuck on Central Time I’m the heron hiding in the cover of cloud I’m the slick-oil back golding under bow I'm the coyote straying the fence line I'm always I'm always on Central Time

credits

released February 15, 2024

Written by Sarah Michelle Magill
Produced, engineered & mixed by Zach Hanson
Mastered by Huntley Miller
Recorded at The Hive in Eau Claire, WI
Environmental sound recorded by Sarah Michelle Magill in various locations, except 2, recorded by Redditor @roffels.

Keys, vocals & drum programming (7) by Sarah Michelle Magill
Drums (1,2,4,5,7,9,10,11), bass (1,3,5,6), guitar (2,3,5,9,11), percussion (2,5,7,9,10,11), piano (6) & Loopy Lou (7) by Zach Hanson
Pedal steel by Ben Lester (1, 4, 7, 11)
Upright bass (2,4,9) by Jeremy Boettcher
Flute (9,10) & Saxophone (3, 4, 6, 9) by Tim Sullivan
Drums (3,7) & Background vocals (1,2, 3, 5 ) by S. Carey
S. Carey appears courtesy of Jagjaguwar.

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Quiet Takes

Songwriter Sarah Magill makes music for feelers as Quiet Takes. A writer and wanderer, Magill has a nomadic creative practice and released her first full-length solo album (recorded in Eau Claire, WI, with producer Zach Hanson) February 2024.

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